If you have never been there, you don't get it. How can people be depressed? About 10 years ago, five of my family members died within an 18 month period to include my only sibling and my dad. You think if you are a Christian, or spiritual person, you shouldn't feel this way. You go through all the rationalizations of your faith, and your beliefs. I found myself hardly able to get out of bed each morning. I didn't accomplish much during the day. I didn't make dinner for my family much any more. I could hardly function. My children's music business failed. Every morning I got in the shower, laid my head against the tile as the warm water ran over me, and I cried. I did that everyday for about a year.I would try to talk to God, but God seemed so far away and I could not hear his voice or feel his presence. Now I had always been a deeply spiritual person who prayed daily, fasted weekly and did contemplative prayer. It felt as though even God had left me in this deep, dark sad place. My husband and son wanted the old me back. I couldn't find the old joyful me anywhere. One day I woke up and still filled with sorrow, decided I couldn't spend one more day not working and making my family suffer because of my depression. It was weird, but once I decided I had to do something, an acquaintance called and wanted to know if I would wait tables at a restaurant she was managing. I had never waited tables in my life. I said OK and started that day. It is a profession of service. Getting out everyday to serve other people was the start of my healing. It wasn't a good job, and certainly not a long term assignment for me. But it was thinking about something besides my feelings and my sorrow. Ten years have past. I have a fabulous job. I have had a book published, and write for this website. I am a joyful spiritual praying person again. But now my heart goes out to those who grieve and suffer from depression. Having recovered from depressioin without medication or therapy I will share what I believe helped me:
- A job that involved service to others
- Began to think about serving in the community and did some work with homeless people who needed jobs.
- Began a gratitude journal, wrote everyday at least one small thing I was thankful for. Gratitude worked wonders for my attitude.
- Got better jobs and worse jobs but continued to move forward.
- Began to ask God what my higher purpose involved.
- Began to write about prayer after a weekend of meditation and contemplative prayer.
- If I had it to do over, I would find a prayer partner to help me get back into my prayer time more easily. Prayer has always been healing for me and a prayer partner would have helped.
- Every day, every week, every year feel I am getting stronger and rarely have sadness enter my emotional state these days.
- Rejoice, worship, seek God and his will in my life.
- Ask each day to be a blessing to my co-workers, my family and the people I come in contact with.
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