My Reputation
In 1733, John Wesley wrote a prayer of submission. It is a part of a number of vows that he took before God. The one I wrestle with the most is his prayer about his reputation. It is in the seventh stanza of the prayer and he writes to God:
I give you my reputation. May I never value it, but only in respect of you; nor endeavor to maintain it, but as it may do the service and advance your honor in the world.
I worry about what other people think far more than John Wesley ever would. The Spiritual Formation Network in Colorado Springs (an inter-denominational group) spent some time in meditation on the entire prayer a few weeks ago, but this stanza has haunted my thoughts.
What would it take for me to surrender my concern for my reputation? I don’t know. Some people never worry about what others think. I have heard that there is no need to consider what folks think about you because aren’t thinking about you at all. That would be great. But I think we all value our reputation and even when we have nothing else, we still pride ourselves in holding onto a good one.
Perhaps I would act differently. Maybe I would run faster and jump higher by not being held back by conscientiousness. John Wesley surrendered everything, he let nothing hold him back. I admire that and wish I could do the same.
May 15th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Hi Erin –
Thanks for posting this exercise from the Spiritual Formation Network. We were so glad that you joined us last month.
This was a very thought provoking exercise. To me it was about whether I could really give up everything for God. I know that reputation is really a big one for most people, including me.
I’ve heard for years that we shouldn’t worry about what others think of us, but that’s really hard for me. It’s tough to know that there are people who probably don’t think much of me. But I guess I need to take the longer view and consider that God’s opinion is the one that really matters. That’s nice to say, but hard to do.
Keep up the good work.
Lisa